6 Animals That Look Scary, But Are Actually Quite Cool Once You Get Over the Whole "WHAT THE FUCK" Part

As the people at cracked.com like to say, "Mother nature has got it out for us, and so has filled the earth with hundreds of creepy animals that can kill you in half a second." (I'm paraphrasing.)

Well I'm going to follow that thinking, and instead of supplying information on how many creatures can kill you and where they live (hint: Australia), I will list animals that actually won't kill you. Albeit animals that look like they crawled out from God knows where, but still pretty harmless.

1. The Wolf Eel

I originally found this one through a facebook quiz. The picture result was thus:

I immediately screamed, "DEAR GOD WHAT IS THAT THING," and hid under my covers. I don't know if that's a dead and bloated wolf eel or what, but this is what they really look like.

Although it looks like an old man that can eat you, your family, and your dog all in one sitting, the wolf eel is actually quite peaceful. They are found mainly in the Pacific northwest, and are a favorite among scuba divers. They live in dens, and eat mainly sea urchins and other spiny things that seem impossible to digest. Wikipedia notes that they can be aggressive, but come on, its wikipedia. All other sources have noted that they are mostly friendly creatures, so I suppose one will try and bite your arm off, say, if you punch it in the nose. But come on, who would want to do that to THIS?

Om nom nom nom!

2. The Sea Pig

This too, was found through a facebook quiz. Unfortunately, this animal really does look like this. Nothing can be done to save it.

The oddity does not stop there. Although not much is known about it, we do know that what a sea pig actually is is a sea cucumber. It lives on the bottom of the ocean floor and it eats mud. I am not making this up. Also, the sea pig seems to be the most abundant type of animal down there. As extremescience.com puts it, "The sea floor must be 'hog heaven' for these sea pigs!" Indeed. Maybe there is something to be said for eating mud. And, you know, it doesn't look that freaky once you get used to it. Maybe it's kind of cute?

Nope. Still kind of freaky.

3. Attenborough's Long-Beaked Echidna


Long thought to be extinct, this particular species of echidna has recently been found Papua New Guinea. Other species, such as the short-beaked echidna, live where all the rest of the freaky animals live: Australia. And if you need to know why they are freaky, look below. Yeah, there's a lot of phallic imagery going on there.

It just wants a high five.

Phallic imagery aside, these guys are pretty cool. They're like a very confused ant eater crossed with a platypus. They eat ants and other bugs pretty much the same way ant eaters do - they slurp them up using their long, sticky tongues. Not only are they sticky, their tongues have tiny spines on them to capture meals. And they lay eggs like a platypus. And their noses look like penises.

AND they're CUTE!

This is getting long, and I know some people have the attention span of gnats or flies or echidnas with cameras, so for animals 4-6, stay tuned!